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Brushed Lightly By Might Have Beens
All of Us Have a Soundtrack to Our Lives
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Forgiveness is a rare thing
We all have a great capacity for loss.

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Life, viewed sideways. Emotions, amplified. Answers, questioned. Me, between the lines.




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- Identity Crisis ("Who am I?")
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- We All Have a Great Capacity for Loss
- Brushed Lightly By Might Have Beens
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- Exotic in Thin Air (Part 5, The Andes Express)



 
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"From this hour I ordain myself loos'd of limits and imaginary lines, going where I list, my own master total and absolute, Listening to others, considering well what they say, Pausing, searching, receiving, contemplating, Gently, but with undeniable will, divesting myself of the holds that would hold me."

Walt Whitman (1819-92)




"When I look back now over my life and call to mind what I might have had simply for taking and did not take, my heart is like to break."

Akhenaton (d. c.1354 BC)











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Tuesday, September 02, 2003
 

Dreaming of Ivory Towers

dor·mi·to·ry
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural -ries
Etymology: Middle English, from Latin dormitorium, from dormitus, past participle of dormire
Date: 15th century
1 : a room for sleeping; especially : a large room containing numerous beds
2 : a residence hall providing rooms for individuals or for groups usually without private baths
3 : Where my dreams insist on taking me.

Lately, I've been dreaming of college.

Let me explain that. I'm not talking about hoping I go or anything, I've already done that twenty years and more ago. I'm talking about sleeping dreams that bring me to my college dormitory or other places on the campus.

I've never really had a recurring dream before, but in the last year or so I've had two. They are not ever identical, but the setting is the same. And its getting more frequent.

The first group is dreams that put me at a moment where I am checking into a dormitory room at the place where I went to college. Usually this is in the dorm that at that time they used for freshman, although sometimes its in other dorm buildings. Its usually either the first day everyone arrives or just before it. Sometimes I am by myself, sometimes I have roommates, up to three of them.

I never seem to know my roommates very well.

From that jumping off point, the dream can go almost any direction, or it can end up there from any direction too. One started in the dorm room and ended with a tornado. Another started with a famous man's funeral and ended up on campus. Another featured a parade down the main boulevard of the campus with floats and all kinds of things. But there is always that tie in with college and my college experience.

Oddly, going to class has never been a part of these dreams. So when I look up "school" in the online dream sites, I wonder if the symbolism of "learning" really applies. Perhaps instead I am dealing with unresolved issues from my past, and feel compelled to revisit that place?

Another recurring location in my dreams is this little seaside town that I have never really been to. It has a street parrallel to the shore that ends in a cul-de-sac which is surrounded by little shops and restaurants. In the center is a fountain. There is usually some reference to a lost love or something else I have lost, but not for forever. A lot of times I am seeking it. Normally I am alone or there are only a couple of people about.

The season is usually Autumn. Off season.

Come to think of it, thats the season for the college dreams too.

The dream dictionaries list "sea" as symbolising "unfulfilled anticipations." Yeah, I got a few of those.

Of course, who knows how accurate the typical "dream dictionary" is? All I know is that I am apparently trying to tell myself something.

And I want to know what it is.


Dreams surely are difficult, confusing, and not everything in them is brought to pass for mankind. For fleeting dreams have two gates: one is fashioned of horn and one of ivory. Those which pass through the one of sawn ivory are deceptive, bringing tidings which come to nought, but those which issue from the one of polished horn bring true results when a mortal sees them.
Homer (800 BC - 700 BC), The Odyssey



Permalink: 9/02/2003 03:24:00 PM |
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