"From this hour I ordain myself loos'd of limits and imaginary lines, going where I list, my own master total and absolute, Listening to others, considering well what they say, Pausing, searching, receiving, contemplating, Gently, but with undeniable will, divesting myself of the holds that would hold me."
Walt Whitman (1819-92)
"When I look back now over my life and call to mind what I might have had simply for taking and did not take, my heart is like to break."
Akhenaton (d. c.1354 BC)
And now, the current weather, from some random person we pulled off the street:
Friday, April 23, 2004
On Antelopes
wit Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English, from Old English; akin to Old High German wizzi knowledge, Old English witan to know
1 a : astuteness of perception or judgment : ACUMEN b : the ability to relate seemingly disparate things so as to illuminate or amuse c (1) : a talent for banter or persiflage (2) : a witty utterance or exchange d : clever or apt humor
2 : my grandson
Sometimes things just jump out at you from nowhere.
A couple of years ago, my grandson was staying the weekend with us. He would have been six years old at the time. We had gone to the dollar store and bought a few toys so he would have something to do while he stayed with us.
One of the toys we bought was a whoopie cushion.
You can imagine how much a six year old boy would love this. He ran all over the house, blowing it up and plopping down on it with a "spuplupluplupluppppppptthhh!" Then he ran into the living room where I was, demonstrated his newfound skill, and announced to the world:
"I love farts!"
I gotcha now, kid. Just wait till you introduce us to your first girlfriend, boy do *I* have a story to tell!
Anyways, now he's eight, and is starting to come into his own as far as his mind and sense of humor goes. Somehow he seems to have routed right around his silly phase, and into his "actually make a good joke phase."
This weekend, we took him to a park where they had antelopes. There were a bunch of them in an enclosure, and all of them were digging in the dirt and had their heads up to their shoulders in the holes.
So he says, "What are they doing? Digging for Chinese food?"
For a moment I was baffled, then the joke hit me. From an eight year old, that's pretty awesome. (Think about it, you'll get it...)
But I'm not gonna forget the whoopie cushion thing...
Humor is by far the most significant activity of the human brain.
Edward De Bono
Just Say No II A study of sex education programs in schools in Texas finds the state’s abstinence-only policy doesn’t work as well as hoped. “We didn’t find what many would like for us to find,” said Texas A&M University researcher Buzz Pruitt. His study shows that 23 percent of ninth grade girls have already had sex by the time they received abstinence lessons. And after they attend, the percentage increased. The numbers for boys are even worse, but they lag the girls by a year. Abstinence education, which must have “as its exclusive purpose, teaching the social, psychological, and health gains to be realized by abstaining from sexual activity” to get federal funding, has been strongly pushed by President George W. Bush, who was governor of Texas before he was elected president. (Dallas Morning News) ...Because girls said no to him while he was in school, and he wants to be sure that doesn’t change now that he’s out. Available in This is True: Book Collection Vol. 11
